What do you say when someone dies in Italian? In this situation, usually words fail us, even when speaking our native language. If you have an Italian friend, relative or colleague who is mourning a loved one, you probably want to reach out to them, but may not know what to say.
For help on how to offer condolences, we’ll explain how to use phrases like mi dispiace, condoglianze, and ti sono vicino. You will also find out how to write a sympathy card or email in Italian, and how to address your letter to make sure it gets there. You will also learn how to respond if you are the one to receive condolences, or a sympathy card.
Table of Contents
HOW TO OFFER CONDOLENCES IN ITALIAN
Here are some simple phrases that you can use to express sympathy in Italian when someone dies.
MI DISPIACE
Mi dispiace means I’m sorry. It gets right to the point.
The pronunciation of mi dispiace is: mee dis-pee-AH-cheh
Listen to how to pronounce mi dispiace here:
You can also embellish the phrase mi dispiace:
Mi dispiace tanto means I’m very sorry.
Mi dispiace tantissimo means I’m extremely sorry.
CONDOGLIANZE
Condoglianze means condolences in Italian.
The pronunciation of condoglianze is: cohn-doh-ylee-AHN-zeh
Listen to how to pronounce condoglianze here:
Condoglianze is fine to say by itself, or you can use the following phrases which are more complete.
Le mie condoglianze
My condolences.
Sentite condoglianze
Deep condolences.
Le mie/nostre più sentite condoglianze
My/Our deepest condolences
Le mie/nostre più sentite condoglianze a te e alla tua famiglia
My/Our deepest condolences to you and your family (informal)
Le mie/nostre più sentite condoglianze a lei e alla sua famiglia
My/Our deepest condolences to you and your family (formal)
Le mie/nostre più sentite condoglianze a tutta la famiglia
My/Our deepest condolences to the entire family
TI SONO VICINO
Ti sono vicino means I am close to you. It is a way to tell the bereaved person you are with them, that you are nearby to support them.
The pronunciation of ti sono vicino is: tee soh-noh vee-CHEE-noh
Listen to how to pronounce ti sono vicino here:
The phrase changes slightly depending on who you are speaking to, and whether you are a man or a woman.
If you identify as a man, say:
Ti sono vicino to someone you are close to
Le sono vicino to someone you have a formal relationship with
Vi sono vicino if you are speaking to more than one person
If you identify as a woman, say:
Ti sono vicina to someone you are close to
Le sono vicina to someone you have a formal relationship with
Vi sono vicina if you are speaking to more than one person
HOW TO RESPOND TO ITALIAN CONDOLENCES
Whichever phrases they use, when someone says they’re sorry about the death of your loved one, there’s a simple way to respond:
Grazie: Thank you.
If you are especially touched and wish to express especially heartfelt gratitude, you can say:
Grazie di cuore: Thank you from the heart.
HOW TO WRITE A SYMPATHY CARD IN ITALIAN
A sympathy card is probably the best way to tell someone you’re sorry that their loved one died. Even if you’ve already told them in person, they are sure to appreciate a heartfelt note or email. It can be difficult to find the words even in your native language, but here are some guidelines for writing a condolence card in Italian.
ADDRESSING YOUR CARD
For someone you know well, use:
Caro (+ man’s name) Dear (name)
Cara (+ woman’s name) Dear (name)
If you don’t know the person very well, and you have a formal relationship:
Gentile Sig. (+ man’s last name) Dear Mr. (name)
Gentile Sig. ra (+ woman’s last name) Dear Mrs. (name)
THE BODY OF THE CARD
Next comes your message. Here are some sample phrases of what to write in an Italian sympathy card:
Mi dispiace per la perdita di (name)
I’m sorry for the loss of (name)
Mi dispiace per la scomparsa di (name)
I’m sorry for the passing of (name)
Sono addolorato/a per la perdita/scomparsa di (name)
I’m sorrowful for the loss/passing of (name)
Sono con te
I am with you (to someone you have a casual relationship with)
Sono con voi
I am with you (to more than one person)
Siamo con te
We are with you (to someone you have a casual relationship with)
Siamo con voi
We are with you (to more than one person)
Ti/Le/Vi faccio le mie condoglianze
I give you my condolences (informal/formal/plural)
Ti/Le/Vi porgo le mie condoglianze
I offer you my condolences (informal/formal/plural)
Ti/Le/Vi porgo le mie più sentite condoglianze
I offer you my deepest condolences (informal/formal/plural)
Porgo le mie più sentite condoglianze a tutta la famiglia
I offer my deepest condolences to the entire family
Esprimo il mio/nostro cordoglio
I express my/our condolences
To make the card more personal, you can describe the person who died. Make sure your adjective has the correct ending depending if you are describing a man or a woman. Here are just a few possible adjectives.
Era . . . . He/she was . . . .
speciale special
straordinario/a extraordinary
gentile kind
unico/a unique
SIGNING YOUR CARD
Then you can sign your letter. Usually it is most appropriate to end simply, with just your signature. If you are close to the bereaved person, you can include one of these phrases before your signature.
Ti abbraccio With a hug (informal)
Con affetto With affection
HOW TO RESPOND TO AN ITALIAN SYMPATHY CARD
When you’re grieving, it’s generally understood that you get a free pass and don’t have to respond to sympathy cards, at least not right away. However, when you are ready, here are some phrases to use.
Grazie. Thank you
Grazie per le tue preziose parole. Thank you for your precious words.
Grazie per il tuo affetto in questo momento difficile. Thank you for your affection in this difficult moment.
HOW TO ADDRESS A LETTER TO ITALY
The Italian postal service isn’t exactly famous for being fast. To help move your condolence card along, make sure you use the correct Italian address format below:
[RECIPIENT’S LAST NAME] [FIRST NAME]
[STREET NAME] [BUILDING NUMBER]
[POSTAL CODE] [CITY NAME] [PROVINCE ABBREVIATION]
ITALIA
The Italian postal code is called the CAP. You can check the CAP and the province abbreviation of the city you’re sending to here.
Here’s an example of how to put it all together.
ROSSI GIUSEPPE
VIA GARIBALDI, 100
00054 FIUMICINO (RM)
ITALIA
BEREAVEMENT and FUNERAL CUSTOMS IN ITALY
In Italy, when someone dies their family often posts a death announcement, or annuncio funebre. It is displayed on public surfaces in town, or in the local newspaper (now online as well). It can be very short, with just the name and birthday of the deceased. Other annunci funebri announce the time and place of the funeral, and others are very descriptive.
Il lutto is mourning. Small, family-run shops are still common in Italy. When a loved one dies, shopkeepers close the shop and hang a sign on the window that says chiuso per lutto, or closed for mourning/bereavement.
Italy is a Catholic country, so many funeral rituals are tied to the church. Church funerals are the most common, though people of other religions certainly have funerals in accordance with other traditions. Civil funerals can be held in a room at the town hall, or another civic space.
People send flowers to the bereaved, or directly to the church so they can be displayed during the funeral. They send condolence cards as well. Even though food plays such a central part in Italian culture, in Tuscany, for example, people do not bring gifts of food to the bereaved.
Servizi funebri, onoranze funebri, and pompe funebri are funeral service businesses.
Space is precious in Italy, and burial rites reflect this. Today, the deceased are often interred at a cimitero (cemetery) in the ground for a limited amount of time. Then their remains are exhumed and placed in a loculo, or niche. Loculi can also be used to hold cremains (cremation is becoming more popular in Italy).
Most towns have a cemetery on the outskirts of town. They are walled-in and completely enclosed, often on hillsides with beautiful views. In the countryside, you can come across much older country graveyards with headstones.
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